I Need a Lullaby. That or a New Reticular Formation

"It's 3am I think I'm lonely." (Matchbox 20, 19??). Rather..... it's 5:30am and I know I'm wide awake. Been having trouble sleeping the last couple weeks and I've been blaming it mostly on the heat but the last two days and nights have been quite reasonable and I actually woke up shivering this morning and am a little bivverly right now. However, sleep still seems quite a ways away.

I went and played pool with Jim G. tonight at Celebrity Billiards up on the mountain here in Hamilton. It's a pretty nice pool hall but JIM likes it because you can still smoke there providing you become a member for the over the top price of $1 whole dollar. I guess the NL government learned from Ontario's mistakes and banned the private club option and patios. Quite possibly a good thing but I'm sure a lot of businesses in Newfie are going to suffer because of the anti-smoking regulations. Anyway, more importantly, I whooped Jim's butt in 8 ball (3 of 3 races to 5 --- at $5/set) however I'm still trying to figure out how he beat me 5 games to 4 in 9-ball, mind must have been elsewhere or the heat. Oh yeah we also had a quick bite to eat at this place called Lick's which kinda has a 50's diner kind of theme and the biggest hamburgers I have ever seen. I was going to order a double burger but decided not to at the last minute thank God, I could barely get my mouth around the single burger and you've all seen me eat before!

Other than that I've done very little besides work and the occasional game of softball which is usually not as enjoyable as it could be again possibly due to the pyroclastic like air we are having. Brutal! Did I mention that it is really bloody hot? I started experiment 2 and have some preliminary data analysis done and will do more tomorrow depending on when I wake up if I ever actually get to sleep

Anyway.... no fancy pics or anything overly amusing to say so i am going to take off and see if I can sleep now. Hope all is well with whoever sees this. Be good.

Humor is Universal But Some Say Mine Isn't

Can't sleep and need a smile so I thought this might help. Here are a number of jokes that I love but others don't seem to enjoy as much.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Interrupting Cow.
Interrupting C.....MOOOOO.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

A piece of bacon and an egg are in a frying pan.
The egg looks at the bacon and says, "Man...is it ever hot in here."
The bacon says, "Holy...!!! A talking egg."

Two pieces of rope walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "Sorry but we don't serve rope in here."
The ropes walk back outside, dejected and still thirsty.
One rope says, "You unravel yourself at that end and I'll tie us together here in the middle and we'll go back in the bar disguised and he'll serve us."
So that's what they did and they walked back into the bar.
The bartender looks them up and down and says, "Aren't you those two pieces of rope that were in here earlier?"
They replied, "Frayed Knot"

A duck walks into a pharmacy and asks for some chapstick.
The pharmacist says, "Will that be cash or charge?"
The duck replies, "Just put it on my bill."

A duck walks into a pharmacy and asks, "Do you have any duck food?"
The pharmacist says, "No. This is a pharmacy. Of course we don't have any duck food."
The duck leaves but comes back again the next night.
"Do you have any duck food?"
Pharmacist says, "NO. I told you last night. We don't have any."
The duck leaves but comes back again the next night.
"Do you have any duck food?"
"NOOOOO !!!! AND IF YOU COME BACK TOMORROW NIGHT I'M GOING TO TAKE YOU OUTSIDE AND NAIL YOUR FEET TO A TREE!!"
The duck leaves and comes back the next night.
"Do you have any nails?"
Pharmacist says, "NO we don't have any nails!"
Duck says, "Do you have any duck food?"

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers!

If everyone in Canada had a pink volvo, what would you have?
A pink carnation

Two cows are in a field.
One cow asks the other, "Are you afraid of getting mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "No not at all."
The other says, "Well why not?"
Second cow replies, "Because I'm a chicken."

And finally....I can tell this because I am a Newfie.

How did the Newfie break his back while raking leaves?
He fell out of the tree!!!

Hope these weren't too painful to read. They are maginally better when voiced rather than read but only marginally I've been told.

Top 10 - Movies That Will Rip Your Guts Out

I'll preface this post by saying that I don't usually watch this genre of movies by choice. That is, i'll usually pick up some crappy Steven Seagal movie before renting something that is a little soft or might start the tearducts roaring into action.

However, this evening I was in the mood so I rented Finding Neverland. Apart from the very end, this was a tremendous movie and I'll admit that my eyes were brimming at one point but dried abruptly with the bench scene finale.

Anyway here's a list of my favorite movies that have brought tears to my eyes. They are all not necessarily your classic tearjerkers and there are many I haven't thought of but these are the ones that came to mind each with scenes that will Rip Your Guts Out

1. The Cure - saddest movie I have ever seen. The sneaker scene, absolutely brutal.

2. Ghost - I cannot listen to Unchained Melody anymore.

3. White Squall - "1, 2, 3 wake up. 1, 2, 3 wake up" Great scene.

4. Gorillas in the Mist - Slaughter Scene

5. Dying Young - Julia is the best crier in show business

6. Forrest Gump - "You died on a Saturday"

7. Old Yeller - No explanation needed!

8. Dead Man Walking - Executions are never good.

9. Schindler's List - Again, no explanation needed!

10. The Island of Dr. Moreau - this movie was absolutely terrible and I cried over the $2 I wasted on it.